Almost first kiss.

      As it got closer to Christmas time, I found out that Anonymous Guy had never seen the lights at temple square. I'd been on a few dates with Anonymous Guy before, so after checking with a friend if she could go on a date to see the lights, I invited Anonymous Guy on a date. For the sake of easier story telling, let's call him Bob. About a week or so later, Bob, a couple friends, and I are in Salt Lake City and after a minor fiasco, we find a place to park, get out and start walking. Of course it's cold so Bob's being nice holding my hand to "keep it warm" and I'm having a great time laughing and talking with my friends. It's important to note that Bob was the first guy I'd been on more than one date since I'd turned 16 a few months before, so I was feeling pretty special.
      A couple of blocks and a few lit up trees later, we reach Temple Square. The four of us are walking along, laughing and having good time, but we all pause at the reflection pool in front of the temple and look at the glowing, floating orbs and the nativity scenes. Bob, still holding my hand, looks over at me and says "Rachel?". I look over at him and he has this serious look on his face, but he also looks really confused, as he grabs my other hand. I had NO clue what was going on. So I'm standing there in this beautiful place, a nice, good looking guy holding my hands, looking in my eyes and all I can say is "yes?...." His mouth is moving up and down like a sad little fish. I can tell he's trying to say something, but I'm just getting more confused (remember, I'm 16).
      Just then, my friend comes over and grabs my elbow. She drags me away saying "come look at this!" so over my shoulder, to Bob, I say "tell me later alright?" and I go look. About and hour later, we are looking at this ginormous tree and I ask him "what were you going to say earlier?"  Bob is still looking up at the tree, doesn't even look at me, and says "oh, well I was going to kiss you, but... I changed my mind." Just says it, like it's no big deal.
Immediately a few thoughts run through my head:

1. Bob was going to kiss me?!
2. Bob was going to kiss me?!
3. Bob was going to kiss me?!
4. Well he isn't going to now, so that's that.
5. I'm not as sad as I probably should be,,,, I guess I didn't want him to....

So, I let go of his hand (because he had started holing my hand again) and went over to where my friend was a few yards away. We talked and laughed and had fun the rest of the night but for some strange reason *insert sarcastic tone there* I was a little frustrated. 

      Later that night, he was dropping me off, and I thank him and go inside. He must not have actually wanted to kiss me because he didn't try again. Either that, or I'm a lot scarier than I thought because two years later, that's the closest I've come to my first kiss.